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Ready for Y2K |
Greetings from Kernersville, North Carolina, USA:
Welcome to the Kernersville First! Virtual Chamber of Commerce
Internet web site. These sure are hot times on the old Information
SuperHighway. This here wild, wild world wide web stuff is new to
us, so don't expect a whole lot here right yet. But if'n you will,
take a look around and see whatcha think.
Kernersville -- the ONLY Kernersville in the whole WORLD -- is
just a hop, skip and a jump from Greensboro, High Point and Winston-Salem
(they're just more famous 'cause they produced more moonshine back
during prohibition than we did). We're right close to Charlotte, too,
and right proud of them Hornets. Even if they did fall flat on their
faces. We here in the "Golden Piedmont Triad" stand by each other,
even when times get tough. You'll see!
Anyway, since we're smack dab in the middle of them three bigger (but
not better) cities, everyone calls us the "Heart of the Triad". It's
also 'cause we're the friendliest folks around. Why, even when one
of our banks got robbed last year, our men in blue called him "Sir".
They even thanked him for his cooperation in his arrest -- he robbed
the bank across the street from the police department -- right
before we dumped him in the slammer and just happened to lose that
key. Don't worry, we slide eggs and grits under the bars to him
just about every morning.
We're right proud of the fact that a high falutin' slick covered
businesses magazine from Charlotte -- GO HORNETS! -- (Business
North Carolina Magazine) ranked Kernersville as the 8th best in
the state as a place for doing business. We tried for number one,
but ole Eugene and Ernest ran out of mad money since the
lake dried up ... a whole 'nuther story ... and they couldn't pay
those editors enough to get number one. Anyways, they say the
ranking is a result of surveys of fifty municipalities according
to work force, infrastructure, business climate and quality of life.
In other words, it's a nice place to be.
We heard that our area is ranked 7th nationally by Entrepreneur
Magazine as the best place for small businesses. Well, we
think that just because we couldn't pay them enough to rank us as
number one, that doesn't mean that we're not the best. Oh, they
talk about demonic graphics (or something like that) and other big
technical terms, but them educated people told us we should be happy
with being number seven, since we're only the 49th largest market.
Whatever!!!
Me? I like the schools -- at least here we don't mind when the
teachers hug a kid when he's feeling down, and maybe even pray a few
words to encourage heaven to help him too. Sure, they use some of
them state-recommended touchy-feely crap in their books, but when
it comes right down to it, they'll teach 'em what's right and wrong.
We got this great technical education center -- the land for it was even
donated by this really cool black dude who built this multi-million
dollar personal care products company after starting with just $10
and a dream. He's a businessman, but to listen to him, you'd think
he was a preacher. From what I can tell, we all need a little more
preachin' and a little less "busy-ness"!
This humongous airport is nearby. Also there are nationally famous
health care facilities -- expensive as all get out, but they're good.
And of course, there are more colleges and universities nearby than
you can shake a stick at.
Here in Kernersville -- or K-vegas,
as I like to call it, there's an interesting little historic district (there's
not a lot to it, but we're still proud of it), a
little bitty theater, parks (really nice ones, too -- some
of them built by politicians who got sore that
they only got
This messages has been interrupted by commies ... please
ignore all you've read up until this point... thank you ...